15 Things That Will Annoy Anyone With A Scientific Brain

Well let’s just dive straight into there…

1. “According to my star sign…”

stupid dumb better call saul insult

2. “I try to avoid eating stuff with chemicals in it.”

YoungerTV you have no idea tv land younger hilary duff

What exactly do you mean by chemicals? Because you do realise that literally everything has chemicals in it. Cambridge Dictionaries says a chemical is “any basic substance that is used in or produced by a reaction involving changes to atoms or molecules”. That means things like air, protein, water, sugar, vitamins, literally every single thing ever.

3. “It’s natural and organic so it’s good for me.”

mtv organic veggies fellas eat your greens sperm count

Yes, just like that natural, organic puffer fish poison and that natural, organic opium.

4. “Don’t eat it; it has bacteria in it.”

The Simpsons

Do you realise that you have at least the same number of bacteria cells in your body as human ones?

5. “Gluten/sugar/caffeine is really, really bad for you and you should try and completely cut it out of your life.”

Everyone has a slightly different body and digestive system. Just because you get bloated when you eat white bread it doesn’t mean everyone does. And obviously loads of sugar and caffeine is terrible, but in moderation all foods are fine.

CBS big bang theory sheldon cooper jim parsons talk to the hand

6. “But when my aunt cut out gluten/started washing her face with oil/only ate kale she lost 3 stone and was miraculously cured of several serious conditions.”

nice pointing good job oh you you rock

Good for her, but that doesn’t mean it’s going to work for everyone. Anecdotal evidence doesn’t really fly in scientific communities.

7. “Oh great you’re a scientist. Can you explain string theory to me?”

words english jackie chan jackie chan

8. “Neil Armstrong never walked on the moon.”

"Neil Armstrong never walked on the moon."

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

9. “The Fantene Pro W shampoo repairs your split ends using triple science high-tech protein wizards.”

shhhhh

Yes, this shampoo will make me look like Beyoncé because it’s got ~protein~, ~DNA~, and ~vitamins~ in it. Or these are just buzz words.

10. “Antibiotics are bad for us and are destroying the Earth.”

ok then

Actually they save lives every day. Antibiotic resistance is terrible, but antibiotics themselves aren’t to blame for that – it’s how we use them.

11. “I’m detoxing to wash out the toxins.”

New Girl schmidt grossed out please stop fox

Toxin means poison. You probably don’t have much poison inside you, and if you do, drinking green tea for five days probably isn’t going to help much.

12. “I have a very male brain.”

tv lol reactions laughing laugh

And my very female ears don’t want to hear any more rubbish from it.

13. “Oh great, you’re a scientist. I’ve been getting these weird stomach pains lately…”

Star Wars harrison ford han solo what are you talking about movies

Doctors of particle physics generally do not make great substitute physicians.

14. “Evolution is just a theory.”

clueless duh i'm a mouse

Yes, but it’s a very, very good one with a lot of supporting evidence. Just like the theory that you’re an idiot.

15. “Women can’t do science.”

Shock Top shocktop good one

And now you are no longer allowed to speak. Funny that.

How many of those annoyed you? If you were annoyed by more than 2 or 3, you’ll want to have a look at our Science courses full of like-minded Science geeks!

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