The Shawshank Redemption – 8bit Edition

shawshank-8bit

Computer whiz-kids work on another level to everyone else. In fact, it’s likely to be beyond a level and more likely to be in another dimension. Brains that nobody else could possibly decipher. That’s why this is great. Think Shawshank Redemption crossed with something on a GameBoy colour!! Madness.

CineFix presents The Shawshank Redemption retold via old-school 8-bit wizardry.

Where do we go from here? Computing or film? Well we offer courses in both but we’re plumping for something computer based, like our Access to Computing course. Prime for getting you into university! Click here for more info…

 

Beautifully Haunting Abandoned Places Around The World

abandoned

Whatever the cause, it’s never nice to see a building decrepit and abandoned. No hope, just desolation and rot. It errs on the spooky and the unnerving. These were once pieces of archaeological wizardry. They deserve acknowledgement and respect not the remainder of their existence spent in decay with only moss for company. Here’s some of the most beautiful places that have been left to lie:

1. This lonely 20th-century home in a developing Shanghai neighborhood.

This lonely 20th-century home in a developing Shanghai neighborhood.

Universalimagesgroup / Getty Images

2. An overgrown abandoned village on Shengshan Island in Zhoushan, China.

An overgrown abandoned village on Shengshan Island in Zhoushan, China.

Vcg / Getty Images

3. The derelict lobby of the Lee Plaza Hotel in Detroit.

The derelict lobby of the Lee Plaza Hotel in Detroit.

Timothy Fadek / Getty Images

4. A quiet Ferris wheel in Pripyat, Ukraine, left abandoned after the Chernobyl nuclear disaster in 1986.

A quiet Ferris wheel in Pripyat, Ukraine, left abandoned after the Chernobyl nuclear disaster in 1986.

Sean Gallup / Getty Images

5. The uninhabited Japanese island of Gukan jima, or “Warship Island,” where more than 5,000 people once resided in the 1950s.

The uninhabited Japanese island of Gukan jima, or "Warship Island," where more than 5,000 people once resided in the 1950s.

Sankei / Getty Images

6. This once glorious monument in the Central Balkan Mountains of Bulgaria.

This once glorious monument in the Central Balkan Mountains of Bulgaria.

Geography Photos / Getty Images

7. This shell of a house that has since been reclaimed by the Sahara Desert.

This shell of a house that has since been reclaimed by the Sahara Desert.

Dea / Getty Images

8. These 13th-century flour mills that remain standing in Sorrento, Italy.

These 13th-century flour mills that remain standing in Sorrento, Italy.

Willowisp / Getty Images

9. A surreal scene inside an abandoned power plant in Charleroi, Belgium.

A surreal scene inside an abandoned power plant in Charleroi, Belgium.

Niki Feijen#123223 / FlickrVision

10. A mining village in Kolmanskop, Namibia, where the lines between outdoor and indoor have disappeared.

A mining village in Kolmanskop, Namibia, where the lines between outdoor and indoor have disappeared.

Sergio Pessolano#147474 / Flickr Vision

11. The Maunsell Forts in the Thames estuary that once protected the UK during World War II.

The Maunsell Forts in the Thames estuary that once protected the UK during World War II.

Howard Kingsnorth / Getty Images

12. These 100 villas without a single resident in Taiyuan, Shanxi province, China.

These 100 villas without a single resident in Taiyuan, Shanxi province, China.

Vcg / Getty Images

13. The forsaken International Railway Station of Canfranc, Spain — opened in 1928 and abruptly abandoned in 1970.

The forsaken International Railway Station of Canfranc, Spain — opened in 1928 and abruptly abandoned in 1970.

Ander Aguirre Photography / Getty Images

14. These dusty roofs peaking through the volcanic rubble after the 1997 eruption in Montserrat.

These dusty roofs peaking through the volcanic rubble after the 1997 eruption in Montserrat.

Christopher Pillitz / Getty Images

15. The trees growing on top of the Beelitz-Heilstätten sanatorium ruins in Beelitz, Germany.

The trees growing on top of the Beelitz-Heilstätten sanatorium ruins in Beelitz, Germany.

Sean Gallup / Getty Images

16. The empty halls of the Hellenikon airport, which once served 12 million passengers a year in Athens, Greece.

The empty halls of the Hellenikon airport, which once served 12 million passengers a year in Athens, Greece.

Milos Bicanski / Getty Images

17. These bizarre abandoned ships left to rust in the desert of Aral, Kazakhstan.

These bizarre abandoned ships left to rust in the desert of Aral, Kazakhstan.

Afp / AFP / Getty Images

18. And the overgrown Faliro Olympic Complex where thousands once cheered in Athens.

And the overgrown Faliro Olympic Complex where thousands once cheered in Athens.
Milos Bicanski / Getty Images

As a Civil Engineer, seeing your vision built up and around you must be the best. Seeing it be reclaimed by the elements, nature or the taxman probably isn’t the best. That’s why it’s important to start your career at The Sheffield College to get the most out your time in the industry. For a variety of course levels, please click here.

 

 

Unsolved Mysteries That Are Unbelievably True

conspiracy

Mysteries, conspiracies. Conspiracies and mysteries. Two words to excite the most ardent of theorist and thrust the rest of us into a world of perplexion. Everyone looks a good ghost story but not all are true. These are. Undeniably.

1. The Dyatlov Pass incident

The Dyatlov Pass incident

Nine dead hikers, a truckload of unanswered questions, a government cover-up, and even some conspiracy theories involving UFOs. This incident wouldn’t look out of place on an episode of The X-Files. Oh, and there’s a theory involving yetis, because why not at this point?

2. The Kentucky meat shower

The Kentucky meat shower

Thinkstock / BuzzFeed

This one is pretty much exactly as it sounds. On a spring day in 1876, the skies opened up over an area of Bath County, Kentucky, and down poured pieces of meat. According to two guys who ate the meat – because who wouldn’t want to eat mysterious flesh that’s fallen from the heavens? – it tasted of mutton. Nice.

3. The Man in the Iron Mask

The Man in the Iron Mask

You’ve probably heard of this story through its countless retelling in film and literature, but the historical truth is even stranger than any twist Hollywood could put on the tale. Over three centuries later and people are still trying to figure out the identity of the man mysteriously imprisoned and forced to wear a mask to hide his identity.

4. The Hinterkaifeck murders

The Hinterkaifeck murders

This case contains all the hallmarks of a horror movie: a creepy house in the country, complaints of a haunting, the sound of footsteps in the attic, and finally a whole family being slaughtered by an unidentified killer. You’ll definitely want to check that your doors aren’t unlocked after reading this.

5. The Original Night Stalker

The Original Night Stalker

The Original Night Stalker, also known as the Golden State Killer and the East Area Rapist, terrorised California’s Sacramento County for a decade – burgling more than 120 homes, raping 45 people, and killing 12. He was known to call victims beforehand, and in some cases phoned them afterwards, taunting them. The perpetrator of these crimes is believed to still be alive, and the FBI recently launched a media campaign in the hopes of finding the man who’s eluded law enforcement for so long.

6. The Mary Celeste

The Mary Celeste

The Mary Celeste is one of the most famous examples of a ghost ship – a ship found with its entire crew missing under mysterious circumstances. The vessel was discovered abandoned, but in reasonable order, off the coast of Portugal, leading to lots of speculation about what happened to the missing crew.

7. D.B. Cooper

D.B. Cooper

Associated Press

In 1971 an unassuming man in a black suit and tie boarded a commercial airplane heading for Seattle, Washington. Mid-flight, the calm and polite passenger handed a note to the nearest flight attendant claiming that he was in possession of a bomb and was demanding $200,000 and four parachutes. Upon landing, the hijacker got what he wanted, and his next instructions were for the plane to head for Mexico City. At some point during the journey Cooper made use of his parachutes and jumped from the plane with his $200,000 ransom, never to be seen again.

8. The Wow! signal

The Wow! signal

The Wow! signal gets its name from the signal’s discoverer, astronomer Jerry R Ehman, wrote the “wow!” on the side of the printout containing it. So what got an astronomer excited enough to use an exclamation mark? The answer is an unexplainable radio signal that may point towards the existence of extraterrestrial beings. Despite many attempts, the signal has never been found again.

9. The Max Headroom broadcast signal intrusion

The Max Headroom broadcast signal intrusion

Seriously, this video will spook you out. A Reddit user claims to know those involved. On 22 November 1987, during an episode of Doctor Who, a Chicago television station had its broadcast hijacked. What followed was a creepy video involving an unidentified man in a Max Headroom mask. Here’s a video of the incident itself.

10. June and Jennifer Gibbons

June and Jennifer Gibbons

John Firth / Getty Images

There’s something inherently creepy about twins, and even by twin standards of creepiness, these two are really ~creepy~. Born in Wales during the ’60s, June and Jennifer cut off communication with others and only spoke to each other, even speaking in a way that was unintelligible to everyone else. The story only got more bizarre as the twins grew up and were eventually admitted to Broadmoor psychiatric hospital.

11. The Tunguska event

The Tunguska event

On 30 June, 1908, a large explosion occurred over an isolated area of Russia – the nearest town was over 35 miles away but still felt the effects, which included windows smashing. The blast produced 85 times more energy than the atomic bomb dropped on Hiroshima and flattened an estimated 80 million trees. Although the destruction is widely believed to be the result of an asteroid, no impact crater has been found, leaving the incident open to alternative theories.

12. Cicada 3301

Cicada 3301

Every year since 2012 a secret organisation has been puzzling the internet by anonymously posting complex puzzles online. Is this a recruitment tactic by the CIA or illegal hackers? Or maybe it’s the work of something more sinister, like a cult.

Well, I’m not sure quite what to make of any of them but it’s always fun to lose yourself in a sense of hyper-reality – even for a brief moment. If mad stories about crazy fellas from a time gone by are your bag, get on our History courses today.

 

Top Ways To Make Your Study Space Somewhere You Actually Want To Be

study

Studying from home is a real pain. There’s loads of distractions and 99% of the time you’ve got at least 5 alternatives as to what you’d rather be doing. Many of them beyond tedium. So, with that in mind, have a go at making your study space a bit more welcoming, inviting and productive.

1. Get a cookbook stand to hold open your textbooks.

Get a cookbook stand to hold open your textbooks.

Instagram: @_rebecca_allen_ / Via instagram.com

You can get them in most cooking/baking/homewares shops, like this one from Victoria’s Basement. Sure, you can get the same effect with pegs or bulldog clips, but it’s pretty good to have the book propped up.

2. Make sure you have some really good pens.

Make sure you have some really good pens.

Instagram: @romstudies / Via instagram.com

It’s been proven that you’ll remember things a lot better if you handwrite them rather than typing. So if you’re going to be writing for hours at a time, you’ll need a pen that’s easy to hold and writes well. Stick with ballpoint if it works for you, but something like a gel pen or a thin felt-tip might be even better. Or get a pen grip to be more ~ergonomic~.

3. And stock up on lots of coloured pens and highlighters.

And stock up on lots of coloured pens and highlighters.

Instagram: @inspiringstudies / Via instagram.com

A great way to organise your notes and keep track of different subjects is with colour coding. It takes a while to get used to, and to remember what each colour stands for, but it’s 100% worth it once you’ve got it down pat.

4. Try to have some space around your desk to stretch.

Try to have some space around your desk to stretch.

Instagram: @memroid / Via instagram.com

This might be easier said than done, but it’s good to take a break every hour or so and have a quick stretch of your muscles, to get your blood flowing and keep your brain sharp. Get some stretching ideas here and here.

5. And always clear away books and papers that you’re not immediately using.

And always clear away books and papers that you're not immediately using.

Instagram: @charlenevenice / Via instagram.com

If you’re studying Biology, put away your Maths books where you can’t see them. Only have on your desk what you absolutely need, a cluttered desk will break your focus.

6. Burn a nice-smelling candle while you study.

Burn a nice-smelling candle while you study.

Instagram: @tarzjadey / Via instagram.com

The light and the smell of a candle are both soothing AF, which is definitely something you need while hitting the books. Go for scents like peppermint or citrus, which will pep you up.

7. Stash tasty rewards in your drawers.

Stash tasty rewards in your drawers.

Instagram: @smiesbeth / Via instagram.com

If you’ve got an arduous task to do, like a big reading, or a huge set of maths problems, set yourself goals, with rewards once you reach them. Have a gummi bear or M&M after every two pages, or every five questions.

8. Decorate your space with positive affirmations.

Decorate your space with positive affirmations.
Instagram: @tchang24 / Via instagram.com

Or, if you have a particular score or grade in mind, write it on a piece of paper and stick it where you can see it while studying. A constant reminder of what you’re working toward will help you focus.

9. Also stick a study timetable on your wall.

Also stick a study timetable on your wall.

Instagram: @quest_study_skills / Via instagram.com

Master the art of making a really good timetable for yourself, and that doesn’t just mean dedicating five-hour chunks of time to a subject. Detail what tasks you want to get done and set a realistic time limit. You can find some really cool free printable templates online, in heaps of different layouts. Have a look here to find the one pictured.

10. Always have Post-It notes in different colours.

Always have Post-It notes in different colours.

Instagram: @angamangan / Via instagram.com

Use them when you want to write notes inside textbooks, to mark certain pages, or just to write key notes on and stick above your desk. If you’re staring at something every day, you’re way more likely to remember it.

11. Or get a whiteboard to write to-do lists, or formulas and terms you need to remember.

Or get a whiteboard to write to-do lists, or formulas and terms you need to remember.

Instagram: @euvoupassei / Via instagram.com

12. Keep a small notepad or paper on hand so you can write down any random thoughts or ideas you have.

Keep a small notepad or paper on hand so you can write down any random thoughts or ideas you have.

Instagram: @kikki.k / Via instagram.com

This’ll stop you getting off track. Write it down to look up later, instead of getting distracted mid-way through a task.

13. And, if all else fails, just make sure you have really good lighting.

And, if all else fails, just make sure you have really good lighting.

Instagram: @nepokroeff / Via instagram.com

Natural light is ideal, if you have space for your desk next to a window. At night, you’re best off with cool, white-coloured light as opposed to warm. You can just get a cheap desk lamp, and put in your own globe.

Now that we’re all happy and sorted, let’s crack on with the reason behind said study space re-fit: studying. Take a look through all of our courses (including A Levels, University Level, Apprenticeships, Vocational and more) on our website. Go to http://www.sheffcol.ac.uk for a nosey.

The Most Exhilarating Photos From The Rio 2016 Paralympics

para

The Paralympics was great this year, wasn’t it? Truly great. The sport was at a level like never before and obviously there were great successes in the face of adversity as usual – including the Brazilian crowds which threatened to be sparse post-Olympics. Here are BuzzFeed’s best photos from the games.

What a way to view the action. Right in the thick of it, surrounded by euphoria and a camera in your hand to document the jubilation and celebration. Not all photographers do weddings…many end up covering the best sporting events nationally. If you’re keen to get started, check out our Photography courses today!

19 Photos That Prove Ikea Furniture Is Actually The Goddamn Devil

the moment you know / you put the thing on backwards / you must start over

IKEA; friend of the lazy, the student, the brand flat packed fanatic. Well, instructions and descriptions alike would have you think that’d certainly be the case.

The concept is great – no doubting that – yet the reality is anything but.

1. Ikea is a wonderful place, but building its furniture isn’t always easy.

2. If you’re not struggling to assemble a simple chair…

3. …you’re struggling to get the furniture home in the first place.

...you're struggling to get the furniture home in the first place.

4. And you’re bound to have an existential crisis before you’ve even finished opening the boxes.

And you're bound to have an existential crisis before you've even finished opening the boxes.

5. The thing is, Ikea furniture is supposed to be straightforward.

The thing is, Ikea furniture is supposed to be straightforward.

Not sure this is what they meant by “straightforward” but sure.

6. It’s supposed to be durable.

8. So why is it drawers usually come out like this?

So why is it drawers usually come out like this?

10. Why do innocent, packed full of potential shoe racks end up like this?

Why do innocent, packed full of potential shoe racks end up like this?

11. And why do goddamn book shelves look like THIS?!

And why do goddamn book shelves look like THIS?!

12. If you’re lucky, you’ll manage to still assemble the furniture while clearly missing several key components.

13. Or forget to include a screw that should definitely be somewhere.

14. But if you’re unlucky, you’ll mess it up immediately.

But if you're unlucky, you'll cock it up immediately.

15. Or even worse, you’ll realise you messed up much, much later.

17. You have to live with your poor, badly built choices.

18. And pray that the struggle isn’t as bad next time.

And pray that the struggle isn't as bad next time.

19. Because anyone who’s ever built Ikea furniture knows that the struggle is well and truly real.

Because anyone who's ever built Ikea furniture knows that the struggle is well and truly real.

Anyone who has ever bought anything from IKEA has been through each stage of this emotional tribulation. So what better excuse is there than to start learning to build your own, from scratch, on one of our Furniture courses? There’s none – click here to see more!

13 Films Renamed By Angry One-Star Amazon Reviewers

star-wars-parody

The internet is full of angry people. People who want to rant and moan, and for as many other people as possible to know just how they feel. It seems Film Critics are no exception, although quite inventive by way of truthfully renaming films!

1. Star Wars: The Force Awakens

Star Wars: The Force Awakens

Lucasfilm / Disney / Buzzfeed

2. Captain America: Civil War

Captain America: Civil War

Marvel Studios / BuzzFeed

3. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

Focus Features / BuzzFeed

4. Inception

Inception

Warner Bros / Legendary Pictures / BuzzFeed

5. Django Unchained

Django Unchained

Weinstein Company / Columbia Pictures / BuzzFeed

6. Interstellar

Interstellar

Warner Bros / Paramount Pictures / BuzzFeed

7. The Prestige

The Prestige

Warner Bros / Touchstone Pictures / BuzzFeed

8. 2001: A Space Odyssey

2001: A Space Odyssey

MGM / Stanley Kubrick Productions / BuzzFeed

9. The Dark Knight Rises

The Dark Knight Rises

Warner Bros / Legendary Pictures / BuzzFeed

10. Miss Congeniality

Miss Congeniality

Castle Rock Entertainment / BuzzFeed

11. Braveheart

Braveheart

Icon Entertainment International / BuzzFeed

12. It Follows

It Follows

Northern Lights Films / BuzzFeed

13.Wall-E

Wall-E

You’ve been chuckling to yourself in mild agreement, haven’t you? Of course you have, they’re funny! If you think you can do better, or provide a more honest assessment of any of the above, check out our Film Studies A Level here at The Sheffield College today!

14 ‘Vintage’ Beauty Tips

vintage

Want to look all vintagey this weekend? Of course you do! I wouldn’t follow these tips though, although they genuinely used to be a thing.

And on Monday, take a look through our Beauty Therapy courses giving you the chance to work in a real salon whilst learning. Click here for more!

1. Rub black grapes on your lips to give them color.

Camira and Ruthie test drive the grape.

Adrienne Johnson

The Los Angeles Times reported in 1891 that “pale lips can be induced to show color by friction with black grapes.” They didn’t specify whether to cut the grape in half or just rub the whole thing. We tried both and decided the cut-in-half method was better, because it tasted good.

You probably could rub anything on your lips for two minutes to induce color, but I thought this worked particularly well. It was moisturizing and tasted like all natural Lip Smackers.

2. And plump up thin lips with vowel exercises.

And plump up thin lips with vowel exercises.

St. Louis Dispatch; December 9, 1900. / Via search.proquest.com

A prominent vocal specialist writing in the St. Louis Dispatch warned American women in 1900 that “mere plumpiness is not beauty.” Facial mobility was key. Undeveloped lips were both ugly and often a sign of a “selfish, narrow, mean, revengeful, and censorious” character.

Ugly, mean, revengeful, and selfish? Clearly, we needed to do these exercises: “Hold the lips open with the fingers, keeping the tongue and walls of the mouth and pharynx rigid, then try to utter the vowel sounds.” Ten sets, at least ten times a day.

It was like that old Chipmunks song — “Oo ee oo ah ah ting tang walla walla bing bang!” I think our limps plumped out a tiny bit, and all the pressing and pursing did make them redder.

3. Beautify your elbows with grapefruit.

Adrienne Johnson

Adrienne Johnson

Lina Cavalieri wrote that “your arms are only as pretty as your elbows,” so we followed her recommendation to “rub them every night before retiring with a half grape fruit” and thereby rid them of “disfiguring redness.”

Repeat this daily, she said, but “do not be satisfied with this progress.” You can always do more: scrub with a pumice stone, use a bleaching soap or diluted peroxide, or, as Lina added, “an ingenious girl I know bound slices of lemon on her elbows every night before going to bed.”

This tip actually makes sense because of the citric acid in grapefruit; it smells a little different, but this was basically like bleaching our elbows with all-natural Mr. Clean or Cascade. But the grapefruit splattered everywhere, and then I wished I’d paid attention to the next part of Lina’s advice: “If you place the halves of the grape fruit on a table and rest your elbows in them you can read or chat or meditate.”

4. And use mutton fat to plump up bony elbows.

And use mutton fat to plump up bony elbows.

Adrienne Johnson

Lina promised that a tallow massage will round out these “sharp bony corners.” And it’s true that animal fat is an obvious (if gross) moisturizer. In fact, I’d say tallow is making a comeback today.

Paleo people revived the cooking-with-lard thing and now all sorts of animal fat can be found in alternative beauty treatments. There are lotions and creams made from tallow of all sorts — beef, sheep, even buffalo. There are also recipes for pork fat (lard) soaps. One urban homesteader skipped the whole process and just rubbed pork lard straight into her sensitive skin.

I went the farm-to-elbow route and skipped the whole rendering suet process, and just grilled a lamb chop. I greased up my palms and rubbed a fatty piece on my elbow. Other than the little specks of meat, I thought it was a decent moisturizer. I could definitely imagine hipsters buying lavender-scented mutton fat at farmers markets.

5. Do hand exercises to help develop feminine charm.

“Of all the gamut of feminine charms there is nothing more appealing than a smooth well-cared-for hand,” Annette Kellerman wrote in 1918 in her delightful book Physical Beauty, How to Keep Itwhich I’ve explored before.

She recommended pressing the little finger tightly against the thumb, then reaching the thumb past the lifting finger on either side in turn. And the great thing about hand exercises is that you can do them while lying on the couch. So we did that.

This didn’t seem like a bad idea to cure texting-claw. Some of what Annette calls “graceful contour and suppleness” could be useful after a day of typing and tapping.

6. Try cocoa butter massages to cure a scrawny neck.

Adrienne Johnson

In 1913, a beauty expert named Winifred Raymond explained that “the continued popularity of the collarless blouse makes the possession of a good looking neck something very much to be desired.” In other words, a whole new part of the body to worry about!

All of a sudden, hundreds of different exercises, creams, and breathing regimens — from a diet of raw eggs and milk to daily scrubbing — promised to beautify the neck. Massage was the most popular cure for an “ugly” or thin neck. We followed Winifred’s neck massage instructions carefully:

1. Heat cocoa butter in a saucer over a cup of hot water.
2. Rub into neck with a gentle rotary motion.
3. Pay special attention to the area under your ears because it “indicates the scrawnyness that comes with age.”

The cocoa butter was greasy, but smelled great. We weren’t sure why four minutes were necessary — it felt like a long time to work out your hands and choke yourself a bit. Today, two-minute commercial break increments would be better.

7. Steep your feet in a rosemary bath.

Adrienne Johnson

Gail enjoying the bath.

Lina wrote in 1914 that one way to “give ease to your feet after a long walk” was to bathe them in an infusion of rosemary leaves for 20 minutes in a foot-tub.

If your feet are inclined to excessive perspiration, Lina says you can add tannin, alum, and lycopodium (???). Luckily, my feet are not so inclined, so I didn’t have to. Rosemary is like a weed around here in California, so I went down to my pool and harvested it on the sly.

We steeped for twenty minutes. It was hard to sit still for that long. But at least we steeped together! My friend Gail (above) had a nice time, too. She said, “If I had a valet to draw a bath for me, I would do it every day.”

8. Use cooked cucumbers to thicken your eyebrows.

Adrienne Johnson

Adrienne Johnson

The 1902 advice was to bathe your eyebrows once a day with this recipe: slice a fresh ripe cucumber, add an ounce of cocoa butter, and heat in a porcelain-lined kettle. When it’s halfway cooled, add three drops of rose attar.

I have no idea why it smelled so bad. Cucumber smells good and cocoa butter smells good — but together? My apartment smelled like dank squash.

Experts today say cucumber slices can reduce puffiness through some some combination of antioxidants and the chill of the cold cucumber slices. My lukewarm, cooked cucumber only got us halfway there. Maybe if we had puffy eyebrows, the slices would have reduced swelling?

9. Pretend your ears don’t exist.

Pretend your ears don't exist.

Chicago Tribune, Nov. 2, 1902

“There is no such thing as a pretty ear in all the world,” the Chicago Daily Tribune warned American women in 1905. “It is one of the ugliest organs of the body, unless it is flawless, thin, and regularly convoluted, with delicate, soft tinted lobes.” One writer called ears “deformities.” Another said earrings often only “intensify their ugliness.”

Ears were such deformed, ugly organs that none of these experts really offered a cure. Some said rouge on the lobes helped. But mainly they just prescribed ways to hide or prevent these deformed appendages: ear bandages, ear flatteners, ear slings, ear rolls, ear puffs, something called a “small pompadour rat” that hid the ear under ear curls.

Our ears weren’t going anywhere and we couldn’t make them less ugly; we just had to tolerate them as-is. So we resorted to the most useful beauty tools in the book: resignation and acceptance.

10. Try horseradish lotion to subdue freckles.

Try horseradish lotion to subdue freckles.

Adrienne Johnson

A lot of beauty manuals called for horseradish milk for freckles or a tan (pale skin was in back then). I chose a recipe in something called the Home Needlework Magazinefrom 1908: Scrape a teaspoon of horseradish into a cup of sour milk, let it stand for 6 hours, then bathe the face in it three or four times a day.

Horseradish is surprisingly not wasabi-colored. Even after I bought the giant brown root, I figured it was like a gobstopper and expected something a little bit green-ish. Instead, it’s white and soft, like a spongy jicama.

Turns out that horseradish doesn’t make your face pale, it just turns it red. And stings really badly!

Turns out that horseradish doesn't make your face pale, it just turns it red. And stings really badly!

Adrienne Johnson

My skin instantly reddened, but not in a bad way. More like I had stuck my head out a car window. My cheeks were blushed, my lips plumped up, and I can’t deny that my nose and forehead looked way paler in comparison.

Between the smell and the stinging, it felt like I was doing something important. The pain felt productive, like putting hydrogen peroxide on a cut or getting my eyebrows waxed.

11. Another freckle remedy: lemon juice, vinegar, rum, and rose-water.

Another freckle remedy: lemon juice, vinegar, rum, and rose-water.

Adrienne Johnson

The 1908 Receipts and Remedies: Useful Hints for Everyone on Health, Beauty, Clothing, Food contains 10 different remedies for freckles, including “rubbing a child’s face with lemon juice” before going into the sun. Or mixing ammonium chloride and distilled water to “mop on the face.”

I chose this remedy: “lemon juice, three ounces; vinegar, one ounce; rose-water, one ounce; bay-rum, one ounce,” to apply several times a day.

No immediate result, but it didn’t do any harm! We smelled vinegar-y, which is actually not a bad scent.

12. Try eye gymnastics to make your eyes larger and brighter.

“If your eyes are little, flat-looking, and deep set, do not despair,” Lina wrote in her 1911 newspaper column. “You may greatly improve them by exercises.”

Ceiling-gazing was apparently the cure for too-deep-set eyes; you do this by looking straight up for a second, then gazing down at your knees. If you wanted larger or fuller eyes, first stand with your back to the light. Then hold your face stationary, turn your eyes right, forward, and then reverse. Shift your glance. Repeat up to 20 times.

Harder than it looks! Moving our eyes around felt strangely expressive, like a dance. Maybe eye gymnastics are actually a way to improve how we communicate? But they didn’t look any bigger.

13. Give yourself a gasoline rinse for soft hair.

Adrienne Johnson

I admit, I had my misgivings about this one. In 1914, Lina Cavalieri reported that “Parisiennes have recently been washing their hair in gasoline.” Why? “Gasoline makes the hair soft and silken of texture.” She offered specific instructions: “I wash my hair in a bowl of the gasoline, pour out the first bowlful and wash it through another, then another, until the last bowlful is entirely clean.” But “gasoline is most inflammable,” she warned, so don’t do it if there “is light or fire in the room.”

This was obviously a dumb idea, but I did it anyway! First, I went to my local Valero to harvest some 87. I planned to add a few drops to a bowlful of water, but the fumes were way too strong for the bathroom. I ran out to the balcony and tried to just dip a braid into it. I barely got one dip into one braid and hit a wall. It fumed so bad, and I almost instantly felt the twin pains of a massive headache and the embarrassment of knowing that I only had myself to blame.

Maybe Lina’s 1914 gasoline was different? I asked a friend who used to work for ExxonMobile. He didn’t know about gasoline shampoo, but he did say that “gasoline is safer to drink today.” Apparently, lead used to be a common additive to boost octane ratings until the 70s. So now I understand why gasoline is called “unleaded.” I do not understand how anyone (even French women!) could possibly recommend putting gasoline in your hair.

14. Or try raw egg as a shampoo.

Or try raw egg as a shampoo.

Adrienne Johnson

The easiest shampoo suggestion I found was almost too simple: a beaten egg. A 1906 book titled My Lady Beautiful: Or, the Perfection of Womanhood gave the following instructions: “no better cleanser can be found than an egg — white and yolk beaten together — applied to the scalp. Before making the application the hair should be taken down, combed and parted from the front to the back of the neck and braided in two parts.”

So Ruthie braided my hair, I beat the egg, and Gail did the honors and poured egg into my scalp. I actually replaced my regular shampoo with raw egg for a week and it was OK! My hair felt coarser, almost gritty. Beach-y, if I was to be generous. I could imagine using it before needing to style my hair for extra grip….but I probably won’t.

 

Grammar Snobs Can Now Correct People’s iOS Text Messages

grammar

If you’re at all like me, grammar is a bit of a sticking point. It’s important that it’s right and it’s even more important to let people know when they’re wrong. Right?

Using the new sticker functionality in iOS 10, the app allows you to become the full-time pedant you’ve always wanted to be.

Using the new sticker functionality in iOS 10, the app allows you to become the full-time pedant you've always wanted to be.

App Store

The app description says: “You will have all the red corrections you need to fix typos or common grammar mistakes of your own or those of your friends.”

The app description says: "You will have all the red corrections you need to fix typos or common grammar mistakes of your own or those of your friends."

App Store

You just tap and hold the sticker to place it over someone’s message, then send it back to them. It’s a way of showing you care.

You just tap and hold the sticker to place it over someone's message, then send it back to them. It's a way of showing you care.

App Store

Glorious. That’s getting downloaded straight away. If, like me, you’re a real grammar pedant then you’ll want to cast an eye over our English courses. Click here for more!